When was the last time you went through a breakup? Chances are that at some point in your life, you parted ways with someone – whether it was a romantic relationship or a job or a client – when the match was simply not a good match. Something attracted you to the person or situation at the start, but as time went on, you realized that staying would be a disservice to both sides.
This is why “it’s not you… it’s me” became a meme. As you mature, you inherently understand that you can’t always have chocolate and peanut butter when you put two great tastes together.
Sometimes it just doesn’t work.
Most anyone who has had their heart broken has learned in time that it was broken for a reason. Most often, regardless of how much you may have loved, admired or respected the other person, you eventually discovered there was a better situation for you down the road. As I’m closing in on my 20 year wedding anniversary with Scott, I can’t help but think of my last failed relationship 22+ years ago and how much happier both of us are since parting ways.
And if you’re talking about a work team, it’s so important to have the right blend of personalities. It helps to build your business culture, and having the right people creates magic.
Anyone who has read any of my blogs, or frankly, our job postings, can get a pretty good sense of our company’s culture right from the start. If you dislike how or what I say, it’s a pretty fair indication that we’re probably not a good match. That doesn’t mean you always have to agree with me. In fact, I can get into some pretty heated (but friendly) debates with some of my favorite people in the world, and I believe a good debate can help everyone grow and learn. But if all of my intended humor falls flat for you, we might be less like peanut butter and chocolate and more like oil and water. I mean, c’mon – I’m a hoot.
The most important thing is to show people who you are. If you don’t embrace and share the unique qualities you possess, it’s going to be impossible for you both to recognize your tribe when you meet them and for them to recognize you.
And honestly, being yourself helps avoid having the “it’s not you… it’s me” conversations, and really, who likes having those?